It was the weirdest "talk" we had ever had.

My mother had always been very open and honest with me when I had questions about sex and relationships, but this just took the cake. So what was this strange piece of unsolicited advice I received as we drove through my high school boyfriend's neighborhood?

"I know you really love him, but don't marry him. It's okay to have sex with him if you think that's the right thing to do."

Maybe she saw the gleam in my angst-y, seventeen-year-old eyes as we drove past his house on the way home from school that day. Maybe she remembered what it was like to be a teenager in love. Maybe she and her sisters had visited a spirit guide on their annual girls' night out earlier that year who told her that her youngest daughter would marry before the age of 20 (true story). Whatever it was - and I'm assuming it's probably a combination of all three of these factors - this was a message she delivered with the same urgency and conviction as the information she had been giving me about my body and birth control, the realities of raising kids, and all the other important stuff for my entire life.

Yesterday on The Tyra Banks Show, Tyra interviewed Eric and Lauren, a couple who waited until they got married to have sex. After two years of marriage they are still virgins because Lauren freaks out every time they attempt to have sex. Click here to watch a clip of the interview and see what Jezebel had to say about it.

I don't know if religion played a part in their decision to wait to have sex. But as a card-carrying member of the Christian community I can tell you that I have heard this story before. It goes like this: boy meets girl, they fall in love, and because they are "good Christians" they wait to have sex until they get married, and then after the wedding sex is a huge obstacle for the woman. Why, might you ask? Because a ring and a marriage certificate do not erase years of being told: "Sex is bad. Don't do it, and as a Christian girl, with no sexuality of your own, it's your job to play defense because boys can't control themselves." I'm not saying that abstinence until marriage is a bad thing. But in my opinion, teaching women to fear sex and their own sexuality is emotionally and spiritually damaging.

The church teaches so many good things about relationships: love, respect, commitment, compromise, communication, and self-sacrifice. But I think it can do a better job of talking about sex and sexuality.

Polls suggest that teens feel that girls receive different messages than boys about sexuality. Do you think your church (if you have one) sends different messages to girls and boys?

Do you think churches should change the way they teach about sexuality?