I must admit that I have been a reluctant participant to blogging, but finally something caught my attention. Recently, I had two interactions with a shopping mall that revealed to me the younger generation's--albeit, misguided in my opinion--obsession with looking good. I am a child of the 60's, when mothers routinely reminded us to wear clean underwear and never to leave the house without a slip and girdle when wearing a dress. As an African-American, I was often told to be careful with the selection of the color of my lipstick, so that my lips would not be too pronounced. "The times they are a-changin'".

Yesterday on Salon, Mary Elizabeth Williams blogged about how "Scoring with the drunk chick" scenes are on the rise in movies. Exhibit A: Observe and Report. Which got me thinking, at what point does the drunken sex scene stop being funny and actually become more like advocating risky behavior?

Far be it from me to judge other people's weekend rituals. Maybe having a few margaritas and getting it on with your partner, friend, acquaintance, or person you just met at the bar is how you like to spend your weekend. If so, more power to you. But recent research suggests support for at least one theme from Knocked Up--when you are drunk you may be less likely to talk about your contraceptive options and less likely to actually use contraception. And that is a problem.

In the world of 'hooking-up,' there is just too much information conveyed in vague terms. "So I went to that (insert place name), saw (insert partner's name) from (insert location) and we wound up hooking up."

Fill in the blanks accordingly and you have yourself a sentence released from the mouths of college students everywhere. Even I can admit to it. The names and places may vary but one thing stays constant: the word 'hooking up.' Does it imply making out? Sex? Hand-holding? (Doubtful.) What does 'hooking up' mean?!

Which brings me to the crux of this post: the bases. Roll your eyes as memories of your middle school days come pouring in, but let's be honest. None of us are really sure what the exact definition of 'hook up' is anymore, in relation to sexual activity. Do I really want to assume that it purely means sex, and every time a friend mentions 'hooking up' that they slept with that person? I guess this does apply to a few friends. Aside from them, however, the rest of us are lost in a land of sexual limbo, where various body parts and sexual acts co-exist as separate entities but leave with a common name: hook-up. Ready for a thesis statement? I believe it is of the utmost importance to supplement a "we hooked up statement" with a base number, just for clarification purposes, of course. So, without further ado, the official base system, according to the ultimate scholarly source, me:

1st base: Kissing. Includes any type of kiss you would engage in with someone you were romantically involved with. The awkward, do I give a quick peck on the cheek, air kiss, hug or handshake that you would have with a co-worker: not included. Making out, intense lip-locks, lip-biting, lip-licking (ew.), lip-sucking and anything involving a tongue in general: included. Human geographic range of said kissing: shoulder and above.

Please note: the obligatory touching involved with kissing, of the head, face, waist, shoulder, etc. is included with first base. Any other, ahem, petting (shout out to the older generations!) brings the participant to an automatic 2nd base or above, depending on the area touched.