Monday night's Gossip Girl was just as steamy and scandalous as expected. However, one of the biggest 'OMG' moments of the show was when Lily van der Woodsen pulled out one page of her "list," an extensive inventory of every man she's dated (in perfect cursive, probably on personalized Kate Spade stationary, no doubt). Her current beau, Rufus Humphrey, gasps and then lets out a sigh of relief that there weren't even more notches on her bedpost. Little does he know (or at least not until later in the episode) that another double columned piece of stationary is still hidden in her purse.
How many is too many? Is it possible to have too few? Does it even matter?
I have heard a girl friend groan, "Ugh, can not believe I'm up to number 5 already. I'm only 20!" since due to some complicated algorithm, she could predict that her "number" will have entered the double digits by her desired engagement age of 26, and that is just unacceptable. A double digit number would render her unsuitable for marriage and ensure her a lifetime full of sympathetic looks, dinners for one and of course, cats.
Women and men alike are wrapped up in a game of numbers, where the pressure is felt to have "the right number" of partners on their romantic resumes, fueled by stereotypes and each other. A man only having a few partners may seem inexperienced and naïve, while too many could earn him the title of "man-whore." For women, having too many digits in their list leads to labels of "slut" or "easy" and believe it seems more attractive to boast a single columned list.
Well let me tell you, it is not easy finding the "right one." Like hiring a new employee, we're all constantly looking and trying out new potential candidates. Choosing the best of the first three interviewees just because you don't want to widen your search won't necessarily yield the best results. Sometimes the candidate pool needs to be expanded, perhaps to an Olympic size, in order to find the best choice. So please, future partner, don't judge me on the number of interviews I've conducted. I've hired you and that's all that matters.
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